The Big, Bad, Mini-Plague!

Harsh words for a common vehicle, no?

I have to admit that I didn't give much thought to cars until I was purchasing my first, and we tend to stick with what we know, so I purchased the exact same type of car my mother had passed down to me (which I then totaled). That was "Rhonda" my Honda Accord, and I have been driving Hondas ever since. Not a bad brand to start and stay with, I say.

My husband referred to my Japanese-made sedan as a "rice burner" when we met (he'd worked for an American automobile company) but quickly became a convert as he noticed how well my Accord was made, how nicely it drove, and how little rice, eh-hem, gas I had to put it in to drive back and forth to his place at regular intervals.

After we married and our little girl was born, we looked around for something that would hold a saucer in the back for trips to Grandma's. Not the kind of saucer you put your tea cup on; the kind your 5 month old inhabits when you need to take a shower or cook a meal. Trapped, entertained, for at least 5 minutes before the protests begin...

So, we purchased a Honda CRV. Looking back, I don't know why we didn't look at the mini-vans; I guess it was because my husband's sister tossed her baby's saucer into the back of her mid-sized SUV, and we were copying her at the time, right down the the part where mom sits in the back seat (youth cabin) of the family vehicle on trips longer than five or ten minutes. Parenthood is supposed to make us feel young again, right?

When baby #2 was born a mere 22 months later, a new most-annoying-thing-ever started happening. Because there was very little space between car seats in the back of our CRV for me to sit (made more difficult by those extra pounds I packed on during pregnancy) I gave riding up front with the man who helped me create this fun situation a try again.

It went something like this:

Adorable 22-month old kicks the back of her mother's seat.

"Please honey, keep your feet down, okay?"

Adorable 22-month old kicks the back of her mother's seat 2 minutes later.

"Remember Mommy asked you to keep your feet down? No kicking sweetie."

22-month old kicks the back of her mother's seat a few minutes later.

"Honey, DON'T kick Mommy's seat."

22-month old forgetful child kicks her mother's seat once more.

"If you kick Mommy's seat again, I'm going to have to take Elmo away"

22-month old Elmo-less daughter kicks her mother's seat for the last time.

"HONEY, WE NEED A MINI-VAN NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

3 week old startles awake, and joins Mommy in the screaming.

CRV turns toward the nearest Honda dealership.

Our first Odyssey joined the family tree of Honda's very soon after our second child was born, and we were in love. Power sliding doors, tons of cargo space, more than enough seats, safety...the list goes on and on.

I cannot say that I ever thought much about our mini-van purchase. But hearing a few comments from other moms through the years has sparked my curiosity, and I was reminded of them as we were looking for our newest Odyssey (our 4th!) I came across this review of the 2007 Odyssey by Edmunds.com:

For some people, the minivan is a stigma, a vehicle to be shunned as if it were infected with the bird flu and leprosy at the same time. They go for the big and bold SUV and, in hopes of softening its image, add a trendy stick-figure nuclear family sticker to the back window. While we're fine with all of this, we test enough vehicles to know that the minivan, whatever perceived stereotypes it seems to incur, is still the ultimate family- and gear-hauling machine.
If you prioritize utility, safety and refinement, then your next vehicle purchase could very well be the 2007 Honda Odyssey.

It's the "swine flu" now, but the concept remains the same. There are women out there who would give up the convenience of more storage and people toting space, safety (SUVs are notoriously more dangerous in terms of roll-over risk), and gas mileage, in order to stay far, far away from the dreaded mini-van!

I wanted to know why, so I asked around. I only questioned current mini-van owners. Most of the people I know thoughtfully keep their negative remarks about mini-vans to themselves because they know I drive one. For that reason, I knew I wouldn't get much by way of honest answers when I asked why they had chosen to avoid the mini-plague. But current mini-van drivers might be more forthcoming, so I fired away:

"Did you ever NOT want to drive a mini-van? Why? What changed your mind? How do you feel about it now?" It went something like that, and these are my results:

Friend A stated that she never thought she would drive a mini-van because they were, "Way un-cool". This came out of the mouth of a thirty-something with three kids. I chuckled to myself. She continued,

"My mom drove one" (and we all know moms are never cool ), and this friend said that it wasn't until she and her husband looked at every SUV on the market before she finally gave up and gave the mini-vans a glance.

"I found a mini-van that had all the things that the SUVs had: windows that went down in the back and towing ability. But the van we looked at also had tons of storage space, window shades, power doors, good gas mileage, comfy seats in the back; and the SUVs just didn't compare"

So Friend A tossed her "cool" out the driver's window of her new mini-van and proceeded to tell her friends about how great mini-vans are in attempt to convert them. I chuckled more to myself, because I know this person well, and I was so tickled by her thought process. Perhaps if all her cool friends drove mini-plagues too, she could feel like she'd either a)regained her cool, or b)could enjoy the company of other un-cool, but satisfied mini-plague drivers. Mini-misery loves company.

Friend B had a surprise in store for me. She stated, very matter of factly, that she NEVER had a negative thought about driving a mini-van. She said she wanted one before her first child was born, and knew she would drive one shortly after she gave birth. She listed off all the features that other mini-van drivers cite as their top reasons for choosing this type of vehicle, and insisted that she never second-guessed her choice, felt "un-cool" as Friend A has, and would happily drive her mini-van through her kids' childhoods, if not beyond.

I then wondered if mini-van disgust has anything to do with how women regard their own mothers. Do those of us who have mostly positive views of our mothers (and then by extension, perhaps motherhood altogether) look more kindly on the switch to a vehicle that clearly identifies us as a woman with kids? We pondered that together for a while...she has a great fondness for her mother and her relationship to her, so our theory gained some credibility. Friend A does not have the most positive view of her mother, so again we noted an increase in our theory's strength.

Not to give too much credit to just 2 mini-plaguers, I moved onto Friend C. She said she had never given much thought to driving a mini-van until her growing family forced her to look at options beyond a sedan. She found a brand she liked, a style, and color, and she and her husband made a seamless switch to the land of the Mini's. She only had positive things to say about how convenient trips and errands were in their van. Her two negatives were that her non-mini friends relied on her for transportation for outings since their vehicles didn't have adequate people capacity (and she was stuck with the gas bill), and that on a very rare occasion she noticed that she missed the window-down-radio-blaring-freedom that seemed to pass away as she transitioned to a "family" vehicle. Then again, she said, she wouldn't have that experience in an SUV either. It was something unique to a small sedan, she supposed. And to life before kids.

Our latest "Rhonda" is our favorite so far. She has introduced us to the luxury of leather and heated seats (won't be much use for that here in the South for several months). We are enjoying the built-in DVD player- much, much more than our kids! The seats all the way to the back row are incredibly comfortable, and everything configures just the way we want it. The sun shades, under-floor storage, and plethora of cup-holders are a fun bonus, and those power sliding doors are God's gift to mothers with only two hands.

This van was my husband's anniversary present to me, and for Mother's Day, he's popping a "Choose Life" license plate on it for me. As I enjoy this new toy, I think how silly it is that safety, comfort, and convenience would take second (or third) row seating to "cool".